Write My Friends. Write Beyond the Dark Days!

I have thought about my post for this week. To be honest, I didn't know what to write. This is very controversial to my character because every week I always have something planned to write and talk about. But honestly, this week I have been a discouraged writer. I haven't hit this point in my writing journey in a long time so I know the positivism, the spark, it will come again. Every time I crash and hit the lowest pit, I have hope the light will come again and I will find the joy in my craft. I will find the enthusiasm I had a week ago and I will find the excitement and passion that fills my writing.

I haven't yet discovered what really takes away my passion in writing. It doesn't make any sense at all. Maybe exhaustion? Because there are the days and weeks and even months where I know I'm doing the right thing. I write. So obviously, I'm a writer. But what does it actually mean to say I'm  writer. Does that mean I am cooped up in my room, left out of this world, and placed in my own world with my own characters? Partially true. But that statement can scare new writers. It scared me. When I discovered my love for writing I was scared. I didn't want to do it alone and be alone and be looked upon as a psycho. Let's face it, when we think of writers, we think of those people who wear shabby clothes, shower once a week, isolate themselves from society, and have weird philosophies about the world and universe being one with our mind. But when I refer to myself as a writer, I don't refer to myself as living the writer life. I hone the craft, but the craft doesn't hone me. If that makes any sense learn from it.

But as for this week I have been a discouraged writer. I am working on a novel right now and sometimes I feel as if I'm going nowhere with what I'm doing. I have hit a block in the road so many times this week and if I hit another block, I don't know if I'll have the strength to climb over it. I usually don't express my feelings when it comes to my work and yes, writing is my job, but I figured anyone can learn and even relate to this. We have our bad days and our bad weeks. They will come with such power, trying to knock us down and make us look ridiculous, as if we can't conquer anything. Perhaps our characters are confused and they aren't working for us. Or the setting sounds unrealistic and an incident that just happened sounds impossible. But it's your work, your writing and no one has the right to tear you down. Kind criticism, the type that will grow you is acceptable, but the one that rips you apart and makes you feel worthless, I command you to throw it out. If you truly believe writing is your passion, the one thing you drive on, then go for it and fight against those crummy days or weeks. They will come. I've had mine this week.

I woke up one morning this past week and one of the first thoughts entering my mind was, "I'm not made for this. I will never publish. I have been rejected and it's too hard." Those few words tore me down for the rest of my day and even now it's hard to get out and believe otherwise. But last night, I had an epiphany, I guess you can say. Who am I writing for? Audience. People besides myself. People beyond my family. People apart from my friends and those in my area. But if I don't start with the immediate circle my feelers won't be tested. I need to test my writing in the water I'm comfortable with and then go out and beyond. It starts in steps. The first step is to know you want to write. Second step you must write. And third step, you must write no matter what comes your way.

So for the remaining of this week and next week, who cares what the enemies of your craft say. It doesn't matter. And when you're having a down day with writing, be encouraged, brighter days come right after the dark ones.

"I Refuse to Listen to You!"

So you made yourself some tea, baked some sweets, turned off the phone, and sat down to write. Your fingers swift across the keyboard and the ideas show no sign of stopping. But you stop! You notice mistakes after mistakes and can't possibly overlook them. There are too many for you to go on so you hit that backspace key on the keyboard and delete. Before you notice it, you have deleted more than necessary, all because you were flustered at what you wrote. You feel ridiculous and incompatible to write anything and might even give up. What went wrong? You listened to your inner-critic.

That small voice in your mind is your "inner-critic" he/she told you that what you're writing is worthless and won't get anywhere. That voice is trying to convince you that you can't write and what you just wrote needs to be revised RIGHT NOW. You feel upset, confused, disappointed, and frustrated. You probably thought that what you wrote was perfect, well at least semi-perfect, but then you were torn down with those critical thoughts. But whose thoughts are they and whose words are they?

 None others but yours.

 It is your very own mind that is telling you these things and of course you believe it. Because obviously if you don't listen to yourself you just might make a fool out of yourself, right? It's always better to listen to yourself the first time through than make a fool out of what you just said--maybe? Well don't feel like you're the ONLY one who has done this. Believe me, when it comes to anything that we do, say, or think, we are our very own best critics. We are either too self-centered or insecure about what was just done. Okay, so how does this relate to writing? Easy. We write and our words go public if we share it. But before it even gets there we think, "Wait a second, does that make sense? No. I don't like this either.." So we can be blindfolded and our fingers know exactly where the delete key is. 

It's time that you STOP listening to your inner critic. When you write you need to turn off that small voice in your mind and tell it to come back when you're done. There is a time to rewrite what you just wrote but there is also time to just write and come back later to your work. When you write you should just write. Don't look back at what you just said and don't think how you can fix it. Save that for later. Right now you need to just write and worry later. Your inner critic is strong. It wants you to believe that you can't make it out there in the writing world. If you listen to that stubborn voice you will soon believe it. You have to learn to fight against it and go with what your gut is telling you--YOU CAN WRITE. 

As a writer, or a person in general, you will always feel under pressure and criticism. Criticism comes with living. It comes as a second nature thing for writers. If you cannot block it then I fear that you'll never get anything written down. There is a time to listen to that voice but also a time to say, "Not right now! I have to write." You will not know if your writing is worth it until it's all written out and if you constantly erase how will you ever know? Ignore! And write! 

 Remember that you're writing because you can't not write. You're writing because you have too much to say. You're writing because you want to make a difference. You're writing because you want your voice to be heard. You're writing because you want to see your name out there. And if you listen to those hurtful thoughts about your work, the thoughts that tell you this isn't good enough, you aren't good enough, and nothing you write will be good enough, you will stay in your bubble forever. Because you're not a loser, you are valuable and you can do whatever you set your mind to. Get back up and nip that voice. Kill it and tell it to come back later when everything is done!

And it might just help to know that mistakes will come. You're a human. Did that surprise you? You're not perfect, but you can still refuse to listen to anyone else telling you that what you're doing is senseless--even yourself. 

The Big "C" in Criticism

Criticism can be discouraging 

Ouch! Did someone just say that about MY work? But I thought what I wrote was perfect. How can someone be so harsh, inconsiderate, and heartless?

As a writer the above probably sounds like some of your own thoughts. After all, what you wrote is your work, the words that took you so long to think of, the sentences that took awhile to form and then someone has the audacity to criticize your work? It sounds unjustifiable, wrong, and unfair. But it happens to the best of us. The top bestseller authors still go through this all the time and continuously will. Criticism goes hand in hand with writing. We write, we will get criticized. When we write we are basically putting ourselves out there. We have to develop a strong skin and blow off the hits that come at us. If we take every single rejection slip and critical comment personal, we will never get anywhere. Everyone is looking at us as writers. Some will lightly read our work whereas others will read it with a microscope, looking closely at every word. The people that do that don't understand the hard work that comes with writing, they don't appreciate it. Many times they read because they want to find something wrong in what you're writing.

But then there are the others who criticize and it should be accepted. They say what they say with a purpose, wanting you to be a better and stronger writer. Criticism can make you a better writer in many ways:

• Criticism can teach you how to be more humble about your writing
• Criticism is valuable because it teaches you when your work isn't good enough and must be made better
• Criticism makes you climb steep mountains and walk rocky paths in order to finally achieve what you're aiming for
• Criticism can give you a better picture about your writing 
• Criticism can show you who you really are by the way you handle the situation 
• Criticism encourages you to resubmit that piece in a better way
• Criticism tells you to change the quality of your work
• Criticism makes you a real writer
• Criticism toughens you up; this is your part to stand back up
• Criticism is proof that your work is out there 

Criticism can make you a better writer!

The moment you decide to become a writer and share your work you must expect some sort of criticism to come your way. It is always easier for an outsider's first response to be negative rather than positive. But this will happen. When I received the very first criticism on a short story, I was appalled. I was upset, hurt, devastated, frustrated, flustered, and annoyed. I didn't want to speak with the person who looked over my work. I refused to accept anything this person said and couldn't get myself to talk with them either. It took me a few days to realize that criticism will come but it counts how we deal with it. I dealt with it in an immature way, almost losing a friendship. We must remember that we write because we can't not write. We also write because we have too many ideas freely roaming in our mind. If someone tells you that you can't simply write then I say it's time you look elsewhere for friendships. 

Criticism will come in many different forms. There is the kind of criticism that will do us good. The kind that will grow you as a writer, making you aware of simple mistakes and things that need some rewriting. But then there is the criticism that is senseless to adhere to. It's the kind where someone has nothing better to do than find something wrong with your work. Remember, in order to become perfect in what you do you'll always have to try harder and aim for the best. Certain people will come in your life to help you become that better writer. They will give you tips and hints on how to make the best possible manuscript. However, you must also be aware that just because someone says something doesn't mean it's always the best option to change what you originally stated. Follow your voice and thoughts. 

But yes, the next time that harsh and hurtful critique comes, accept it with an open mind and smile. It's hard. It hurts. And it seems all so wrong. It takes time. It takes time just like everything else, but I promise, eventually those terrible words will come your way and you will have the strength to fight it off. May it be years, but there will come a day where you will know that YOU write because YOU can! And no matter what people say about your work doesn't matter. You're doing this because you simply CAN'T NOT write. Pick up your pen and a paper right now and jot ten things you're thankful for. Remember that everything starts off with a blessing and then the rest will come from there.